Belief & Trust

Universal Breathing

The Universe is breathing

Meditating
Regulating

Nebulous heart beating…for us

Purpose is the network of existence complex veins

Stars provide the blood
Natural Law holds it together, ceasing the flood

A never-ending cyclic game of what appears to be tug of war

The glue that holds us together…forever more...

The Waiting Room (Astra Zeneca)

 
In the WAITING ROOM for my doctors appointment, I see the shadows of corporate entity sponsored representatives with briefcases enter wearing PRADA.

As they leave my heart is filled with disappointment, opened brief cases reveal the latest scientifically manufactured malady oral Band-Aid ointment.

Free samples of side effects affecting future prospects!
We are already sick and desperate, so...what the heck?

Besides my doctor knows what he is doing and would not lie!
He works hard and deserves a piece of the pie.

I walk into the office and say “hi”, his reply, “feeling any better? A new pill just hit the market and it is something I think you should try.” Cash money bonus motivation and paid vacation inspiration!

Naive and desperate at the time so I go ahead with the buy.

A year later, in the emergency room listening to a nurse say “if you had arrived moments later, there was a good chance you would have died!” In this moment I began to cry!

Now, more medication to combat previous medication fuels unhealthy mental masturbation.

For years, anger and rage consume me! How do I forgive and should I even go on trying to live?

AstraZeneca new exactly what they were doing! Modern day Josef Mengele experiment for profits consuming! The public they keep screwing!

How could the FDA allow this? Started to wonder, who was really sick? Me or these Hitler megalomaniac corporate greedy hypocrites? Even in between share holder profits-taking it hard in the ass and sucking on unwanted dicks, they found a way to do damage!

Naturally, I wanted to do damage but I internalized instead. Corporate coward karma, self fulfilled dharma. I thought perhaps they will see the errors in their ways and willingly find a way to repay...us.

I was not the only one, soon a legal battle had begun.
No apologies were issued, just some chump change and some tissues!

Out of court settlement for my still existing health embezzlement!

Many years passed, delusionally, WAITING in my ROOM to see, justice that will not come through perverted lawyer language nor admittance!

Holding on to energies that do not serve me nor my family seeking to find a means of acceptance.
Accepting the unacceptable toward those who profit from the injured vulnerable cannot be done using the psychological.

So, with black heart open wide and with these words I release myself.

The red returns and I AM no longer WAITING in my ROOM for a justice impossible for the criminally insane!                               

I rise up to the sun, a new life has begun, the energies of mercy and forgiveness fill my veins.

Perhaps one day they will understand the law of cause and effect...and a new model of health care will...erect!
       

Choosing

Choosing to be here in this...
Physical playground.

This...conscious, roller-coaster-ride up and down energetic-mathematic-linguistic-musical-spiraling-matrix-merry-go-round!
Choosing to play this game of lost and found.

Eternally playing hide and seek.
Seeking to be humble and meek.

Recognizing now...what I create is what I imagine, believe intend and think.

Makes me think twice.
About this self created-fractal-simulated-holographic temporary flesh and bone illusionary sacrifice!

We are all performers on the stage of life...

Seeing beauty in dark, and dark in beauty.

Changing the way I view reality.
Learning to love this duality!

So, if one chooses to send harmful energy to me.

I choose, return to sender, times three...lovingly!

Insanity Of Normality

Once Said:


“It is no measure of health to be...well adjusted to a profoundly sick society” Jiddu Krishnamurti philosophy.
   
I ask then, what truly normal be?
                   
The opposite of mainstream programming.
The opposite of zombie consciousness-sleepy rest!

I AM currently somewhere in the middle, somewhere in between.
Aware of things never before noticed...never before seen.

Insanity unfolds before me-masked as normality!
Jaw dropping, the obliviousness of it all!

I shake my head in disbelief!   
Even now at times wanting to craw into bed and die!


Normal is to spy
Normal is to lie
Normal is to steal
   
       
Not normal to feel


Normal is to gossip
Normal is to kill
Normal is to be fake
   

Not normal to be real


If you want to fit in-put on a fake grin.
I often smile at the madness to not go insane again!

Shake it off, meditate and go about my day.

Awareness comes with a price-one I am willing to pay.
For it is ultimately a small fee to be free-to be me.

Walking among the walking dead has benefits...the constant needed reminder of my own past ignorance...it helps keep me in check!

The motivation to keep moving forward!
Appreciating my own past insanity and the sanity it has brought me.
Lessons learned in this duality.

Normal and insane are the same to a certain degree.

Fear based programs dominate currently-fear be the cause of the insanity of normality!

Perhaps one cannot exist without the other and are necessary.
Opposites of the same life expression in the duality game.

Normality summed up simply is dishonesty in action-mob rule mentality-ignorance is bliss illusion of satisfaction!

All in an attempt to deny and avoid owning our thoughts and actions.
Currently it is obvious to see the results on society of the normality chain reaction!

"("Walt Disney" "Media sorcery")"

Normality is a spell in which we must choose to break free.

...it begins with awakening!
           
Questioning ones programming.
Looking with(i)n.          
The bravery of self acceptance.
Facing ones addiction...of the desire to fit in!

War is not normal, we choose it to be.
Gossip is not normal, we choose it to be.
Addiction is not normal, we choose it to be.

Theft is not normal, we choose it to be.
Lying is not normal, we choose it to be.
Killing is not normal, we choose it to be.

Psychological warfare is not normal, we choose it to be.
Millions dying of starvation is not normal, we choose it to be.
Backstabbing is not normal, we choose it to be.

Fake is not normal, we choose it to be.
Abuse of power is not normal, we choose it to be.
Ignorance is not normal, we choose it to be.                   

If normal is a choice, perhaps it is time to choose a new normal...one based in honesty...


If the current paradigm of normal be insanity, then abnormal I choose to be!

Always

 You are so good to me...


 

  

Some times not certain how to accept and enjoy your beauty!

It has always been this way, but for a very long time in negativity I chose to stay!

You have always been by my side, the architect of this-eternal abyss ride!

Coping Mechanism

My coping mechanism...is to forgive em!
Negative past memories, not re-live em.

Stay in the moment...own it!

Fight disappointment with awareness and share this.

Put down the fist and slow down the loose lips.
In the mind take trips.

Appreciate dreams...and all the little mysteries that go unseen.